Wednesday, December 12, 2012

Seasons of Simple Thanksgiving

I think one of the greatest adventures in life is that you get to learn something new every step of the way.  And it changes you (if you let it).  It changes you more than you ever could have believed.  In the beginning of our journey to become debt free, it seemed to be just about money and numbers.  Working ourselves to exhaustion to see those numbers going down, down, down.  No balance in our lives, just the stress of trying to get through this process as quickly as possible - which, as you might have guessed from the title of our blog, now seems a little ridiculous.  These past few months, John and I have discovered something that we knew to be true but hadn't taken the time to apply to our own lives.  It's not about the money - it's about our hearts and changing the way we think and live our everyday lives.  And our hearts have been changed.  And our lives transformed.

Recently, we went through a rough couple of months with our finances - I was not getting the hours I needed at work, I had an abscessed tooth that needed an emergency root canal, John was burning the candle at both ends of his job, our "reliable" car wouldn't start, and it seemed the doctor bills were just piling up from having a child who catches everything under the sun from his little "friends" at daycare.  There was a point where Max was having to be seen every other week (literally) for some new illness.  And this is when the change occurred.  We knew we couldn't control these things, these circumstances that always seemed to get in the way of paying off debt.  We were angry, frightened, and frustrated and had to pull most of the money from our modest emergency fund multiple times just to get by.  And then it hit us.  We HAD an emergency fund.  We received gifts freely offered up by others in our greatest time of need.  We were able to fully replenish our emergency fund.  We were able to keep our family fed, the lights on, and the mortgage paid.  We never got behind on any of our student loan payments.  We lacked NOTHING.  Everything we needed, we asked for, we pleaded to God for, had been provided.  And then some. And then some.  More time was spent in prayer, in clinging to God's words of wisdom, in pouring out the love that had been so freely given to us in our greatest time of need.  The more we practiced these things, the more our hearts were focused on being thankful.  During the worst of times, during the best of times, and everything in between.    

The more we became thankful, the more detached we became from all the "stuff" in our lives.  That "stuff" that everyone tells you will make you happy, that "stuff" that is so much focused on this time of year.  And John and I are so tired of "stuff".  We don't need fancy things or gadgets to be happy and we certainly don't deserve to go out and buy these things for ourselves, especially when we don't know how much money we will even have the next budget.  And so we have decided to get rid of some of our "stuff" that we have grown detached from as our hearts have been transformed.  I put my wedding ring up on ebay and craigslist for sale.  John did the same with his TV and sound system from his man cave upstairs.  We did these things willingly, and ultimately the decision to give these things up was not difficult in the least.  I don't need a big shiny ring to know my husband loves me - he shows me in his daily actions and words how much he appreciates me.  And he doesn't need a great big TV and sound system to enjoy playing his video game (which he very rarely gets to play, anyway) or watch movies on.  The message here is not that "stuff" is bad or that it is bad to want or have these things.  It will be great to be debt free and be able to purchase fun items like those we are choosing to give up at this time.  We just know that we don't need or want it in our lives right now when there are so many other ways to spend that money to help us meet our goals.  We are thankful for what we have and that, in turn, simplifies our lives and keeps us from being distracted of the ultimate goal of the changing of our hearts as we become debt free, always living in a season of simple thanksgiving so that we may freely give and show love to others, and leave a legacy for our children, grandchildren, and beyond.

I hope that in this particular season, you are reminded that you are cared for, have much to be thankful for and remember the simplicity of the night of Christ's birth.  Mary and Joseph didn't have much money or "stuff"  and I'm sure they experienced times of anger, fear and frustration.  But they did have the greatest gift of all mankind - Jesus.  He had no bed upon which to lay his head, no warm blankets, and spent his first few days in and environment which was only fit for animals.  But He didn't need anything else.  Neither did Mary or Joseph.  They chose not to complain or focus on all of the things they didn't have, for they knew they were richly loved and cared for and they were blessed for believing that they would not be left alone. They chose to rejoice, with a spirit of thanksgiving, for what had been given to them.  John and I pray the same for each of you.  Merry Christmas.

With Greatest Thanks to God,

John, Maureen, Max, and Bean

"Blessed is she who believed, for there will be a fulfillment of the things which have been spoken to her from the Lord!"  
Luke 1:45


Friday, March 30, 2012

Winning at Life (by Maureen)

This year has been hard.  I'm not trying to be negative, I just don't know what other words to use to describe it.  We've dealt with what has felt like constant physical illness (Max and Maureen - which means no work, which, for me, means no pay - and the pending hospital bill for Max), worsening depression (things are looking up with a new physician, new therapist, and new medicine), death in the family, and slow progress with debt payoff.  Lots of reasons for any person to feel frustrated and upset.  Let's flip it around and look at what good has come of these things:

  • Physical Illness - John and I have had the blessing of spending a day or two (here and there) with our precious son while he was sick and had to stay home from daycare.  It's such a privilege to hold him and just love on him and we treasure this time.  I got some days of rest in when I was sick, much needed to heal/restore me and allow me to continue working.
  • Worsening Depression - Through a trusted physician at my work, I was able to get in quickly to see an amazing doctor who works very hard to meet my needs and has helped me with some other referrals.  I am feeling hopeful again, something I haven't felt in a long, long while.
  • Death in the Family - My precious Aunt Vicki recently passed away after a long and painful journey.  I love her and her sweet, gentle spirit and I will miss her.  The good?  She no longer suffers and we believe she has gone to be with her Savior and is rejoicing in Heaven.  Also, John, Max and I got to be with family we rarely have the chance to fellowship with.  It warmed my heart.  The service was lovely.
  • Slow Progress with Debt Payoff - In January, I started a second job as a home health nurse that I felt the Lord wanted me to have.  So, we saved up some extra money and bought our "Dave Car" (sorry Dave!).  The job ended up being too much for me to keep up with and in February, I resigned.  It took us an extra month on our debt payoff to cross off our next student loan, BUT we now have an extra vehicle, PAID FOR, when we needed it the most.  Thank you, Jesus!  And, we paid off another debt, even though it wasn't as quickly as we had planned!
Every step, every struggle, every move we have made this year (and every year, for that matter) have been guided by the Lord and we continue to be blessed as a family.  This month, we have hit our one year mark in our debt-free journey, having paid off about $33,000!  Looking back, considering most of last year I didn't even have a job, I think we're pretty stinking awesome!  DON'T tell me it can't be done!  It's all about the journey and the challenges we face day-to-day as we continue to be good and faithful stewards and change our family tree. 

Matthew 6:24
"No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money."
Faithfully,

The Culbreaths (John, Maureen, and Max)