Seasons of Simple Thanksgiving

I think one of the greatest adventures in life is that you get to learn something new every step of the way.  And it changes you (if you let it).  It changes you more than you ever could have believed.  In the beginning of our journey to become debt free, it seemed to be just about money and numbers.  Working ourselves to exhaustion to see those numbers going down, down, down.  No balance in our lives, just the stress of trying to get through this process as quickly as possible - which, as you might have guessed from the title of our blog, now seems a little ridiculous.  These past few months, John and I have discovered something that we knew to be true but hadn't taken the time to apply to our own lives.  It's not about the money - it's about our hearts and changing the way we think and live our everyday lives.  And our hearts have been changed.  And our lives transformed.

Recently, we went through a rough couple of months with our finances - I was not getting the hours I needed at work, I had an abscessed tooth that needed an emergency root canal, John was burning the candle at both ends of his job, our "reliable" car wouldn't start, and it seemed the doctor bills were just piling up from having a child who catches everything under the sun from his little "friends" at daycare.  There was a point where Max was having to be seen every other week (literally) for some new illness.  And this is when the change occurred.  We knew we couldn't control these things, these circumstances that always seemed to get in the way of paying off debt.  We were angry, frightened, and frustrated and had to pull most of the money from our modest emergency fund multiple times just to get by.  And then it hit us.  We HAD an emergency fund.  We received gifts freely offered up by others in our greatest time of need.  We were able to fully replenish our emergency fund.  We were able to keep our family fed, the lights on, and the mortgage paid.  We never got behind on any of our student loan payments.  We lacked NOTHING.  Everything we needed, we asked for, we pleaded to God for, had been provided.  And then some. And then some.  More time was spent in prayer, in clinging to God's words of wisdom, in pouring out the love that had been so freely given to us in our greatest time of need.  The more we practiced these things, the more our hearts were focused on being thankful.  During the worst of times, during the best of times, and everything in between.    

The more we became thankful, the more detached we became from all the "stuff" in our lives.  That "stuff" that everyone tells you will make you happy, that "stuff" that is so much focused on this time of year.  And John and I are so tired of "stuff".  We don't need fancy things or gadgets to be happy and we certainly don't deserve to go out and buy these things for ourselves, especially when we don't know how much money we will even have the next budget.  And so we have decided to get rid of some of our "stuff" that we have grown detached from as our hearts have been transformed.  I put my wedding ring up on ebay and craigslist for sale.  John did the same with his TV and sound system from his man cave upstairs.  We did these things willingly, and ultimately the decision to give these things up was not difficult in the least.  I don't need a big shiny ring to know my husband loves me - he shows me in his daily actions and words how much he appreciates me.  And he doesn't need a great big TV and sound system to enjoy playing his video game (which he very rarely gets to play, anyway) or watch movies on.  The message here is not that "stuff" is bad or that it is bad to want or have these things.  It will be great to be debt free and be able to purchase fun items like those we are choosing to give up at this time.  We just know that we don't need or want it in our lives right now when there are so many other ways to spend that money to help us meet our goals.  We are thankful for what we have and that, in turn, simplifies our lives and keeps us from being distracted of the ultimate goal of the changing of our hearts as we become debt free, always living in a season of simple thanksgiving so that we may freely give and show love to others, and leave a legacy for our children, grandchildren, and beyond.

I hope that in this particular season, you are reminded that you are cared for, have much to be thankful for and remember the simplicity of the night of Christ's birth.  Mary and Joseph didn't have much money or "stuff"  and I'm sure they experienced times of anger, fear and frustration.  But they did have the greatest gift of all mankind - Jesus.  He had no bed upon which to lay his head, no warm blankets, and spent his first few days in and environment which was only fit for animals.  But He didn't need anything else.  Neither did Mary or Joseph.  They chose not to complain or focus on all of the things they didn't have, for they knew they were richly loved and cared for and they were blessed for believing that they would not be left alone. They chose to rejoice, with a spirit of thanksgiving, for what had been given to them.  John and I pray the same for each of you.  Merry Christmas.

With Greatest Thanks to God,

John, Maureen, Max, and Bean

"Blessed is she who believed, for there will be a fulfillment of the things which have been spoken to her from the Lord!"  
Luke 1:45

Winning at Life (by Maureen)

This year has been hard.  I'm not trying to be negative, I just don't know what other words to use to describe it.  We've dealt with what has felt like constant physical illness (Max and Maureen - which means no work, which, for me, means no pay - and the pending hospital bill for Max), worsening depression (things are looking up with a new physician, new therapist, and new medicine), death in the family, and slow progress with debt payoff.  Lots of reasons for any person to feel frustrated and upset.  Let's flip it around and look at what good has come of these things:

• Physical Illness - John and I have had the blessing of spending a day or two (here and there) with our precious son while he was sick and had to stay home from daycare.  It's such a privilege to hold him and just love on him and we treasure this time.  I got some days of rest in when I was sick, much needed to heal/restore me and allow me to continue working.
• Worsening Depression - Through a trusted physician at my work, I was able to get in quickly to see an amazing doctor who works very hard to meet my needs and has helped me with some other referrals.  I am feeling hopeful again, something I haven't felt in a long, long while.
• Death in the Family - My precious Aunt Vicki recently passed away after a long and painful journey.  I love her and her sweet, gentle spirit and I will miss her.  The good?  She no longer suffers and we believe she has gone to be with her Savior and is rejoicing in Heaven.  Also, John, Max and I got to be with family we rarely have the chance to fellowship with.  It warmed my heart.  The service was lovely.
• Slow Progress with Debt Payoff - In January, I started a second job as a home health nurse that I felt the Lord wanted me to have.  So, we saved up some extra money and bought our "Dave Car" (sorry Dave!).  The job ended up being too much for me to keep up with and in February, I resigned.  It took us an extra month on our debt payoff to cross off our next student loan, BUT we now have an extra vehicle, PAID FOR, when we needed it the most.  Thank you, Jesus!  And, we paid off another debt, even though it wasn't as quickly as we had planned!

Every step, every struggle, every move we have made this year (and every year, for that matter) have been guided by the Lord and we continue to be blessed as a family.  This month, we have hit our one year mark in our debt-free journey, having paid off about $33,000!  Looking back, considering most of last year I didn't even have a job, I think we're pretty stinking awesome!  DON'T tell me it can't be done!  It's all about the journey and the challenges we face day-to-day as we continue to be good and faithful stewards and change our family tree. 

Matthew 6:24

"No one can serve two masters. Either he will hate the one and love the other, or he will be devoted to the one and despise the other. You cannot serve both God and Money."

Faithfully,

The Culbreaths (John, Maureen, and Max)

Life Since Max's Arrival and Other Things

Life has been so busy lately that we haven't had a chance to sit down and update everyone on our progress since the arrival of our sweet boy.  For those of you reading this who don't already know, our precious bundle of joy, Max Danger Culbreath, joined us on June 14th, 2011 and we couldn't be more in love with him.  We are adjusting to life with a baby, to include, but not limited to: learning to live with the lack of sleep, less time together as a couple, attempting to maintain our social lives, and balancing an entirely new, entirely different budget.  And, for the record, I think we're doing pretty well in all of these areas, but that's not to say there's no room for improvement.  Max is a pretty awesome baby and that helps us out a lot - he's been sleeping through the night since he was 2 weeks old, so there's really not much for us to be complaining about in this area.  As for having less time together as a couple, we openly acknowledge to each other the fact that yes, we have less time together but we also strive to make that time count.  Quality over quantity, people, and this can be applied to many instances in life.  Socially, we still are getting out to spend time with our friends and having "game night" about once a week, even though it takes longer to get ourselves out the door and we're always late (ok, so we were late before we had a kid, but now it's just gotten worse...).  And then there's the budget. 

Remember that since January, I have been looking for a job?  Countless applications resulting in few interviews and no jobs.  Yet, somehow, we made it through until now.  God provided us with the funds we needed, whether it was a bonus, a tax return, or a gift - we made it.  John and I both knew that after Max was born, I needed to work to make this debt snowball work, so when Max was about 5 weeks old, I continued my search. One quiet Sunday evening I was sifting through posting after posting and finally found one I thought might be a good opportunity.  So, I applied.  The next morning (not even 12 hours later), I got a phone call to set up an interview.  The day after that, I interviewed.  The day after that, I got the job.  Wow.  After 7 months of nothing.  AND, on that same day, my dear friend posted that she was looking for a new nanny gig and so I was able to snag her up right away!  AND I got hired on as ECB (Emergency Call Back), which translates to I make my own hours and work only when I want to work.  So my new schedule is this:  three 12 hour shifts/week, Sunday, Thursday, and Saturday (sadly, I will be missing my favorite thing of all, College Football Saturdays, but it's not forever....sigh).  This cuts down on any crazy childcare costs we might have incurred had I had to work a M-F, 9-5 job.  I will say it again.  Wow.  AND I like my job.  What?  Yeah.  It's not what I would want to do forever, but it sure is a great fit for this season of my life and totally meets our needs.  So financially, where does this get us?

It gets us out and it gets us out FASTER.  By our next paycheck, we should have our emergency fund back up and running and I can't even tell you what a great sense of security that brings.  We are able to pay for things we need like medication, gas, dr.'s bills, etc., without worrying about having enough money left over at the end of the budget.  In recent months, it's really been "there's too much month left at the end of the money".  I feel the winds of change blowing through.  I feel refreshed, motivated, and encouraged.  And while it is SO hard to leave Max on the days that I do work, I know that he is in good hands and that this is temporary.  I look at his sweet, angel baby face and know that I am providing for him and giving him a better life - a life free from the bondage that debt brings, free from being a borrower that is slave to the lender.  Lord willing, this precious child (and any more we are blessed with) will not make the silly mistakes his parents made. 

To continue to stay motivated, John and I have signed up to attend another Financial Peace University class, where we can share in the fellowship of others with the same goals and dreams of living a debt free life.  We are winning every battle and we WILL win the war.  We are able to breath more deeply and dream more vividly of the life we can't wait to experience.  We are living like no one else so that one day SOON, we can live like no one else.

Faithfully,
The Culbreaths  

"And the Lord said to Moses, 'I will do the very thing you have asked, because I am pleased with you and I know you by name.'  Then Moses said, 'Now show me your glory'".
Exodus 33:17-18

Partnership

We're back!

It's been awhile since we blogged and we have been missing it - we love to encourage others (thank you to all of you who have sent us your stories and comments) and be encouraged at the same time!  Blogging also helps keep us financially accountable.  It's so great when people ask us how our journey is going and we can honestly tell them we stick to our plan and follow it.  That being said, it IS a JOURNEY and the last time I checked, journeys aren't completed in one step.  Sometimes the road is long and hard and you don't feel like you're getting anywhere.  That's about how it's been for us this past month or so.  We are slowly making headway, but not as fast as we'd like.  Unexpected events have popped up here and there (read: life, it happens, deal with it) but we have been blessed enough to have an emergency fund to be able to pay for these things.  Murphy's law, people - when something can go wrong, it will go wrong.  So, be prepared with your savings and you'll never have to worry about Murphy again!  Let's get down to the good stuff, now. 

Something we want to talk about today is the importance of partnership (marriage) in our debt free marathon.  If you're single and reading this, then you need to get yourself an accountability partner - someone who has the same financial visions and morals/values as you and who is not afraid to tell you NO.  Many people say there are three important aspects you need to be in agreement on before you enter into a marriage:  religion, whether or not you want children (and how many if you do), and finances.  These things WILL make or break a marriage/relationship and you are only setting yourself up for failure (divorce, heartache) if you don't talk about them and get on the same page before you enter into this LIFELONG commitment and then CONTINUE to talk about them.  I'm going to go ahead and tell you that this saved our marriage before it even started. 

As part of our premarital counseling, my mother gave us the gift of going to see Dave Ramsey's Total Money Makeover Live.  From there, we decided that we would go on to take his class, Financial Peace University.  It changed the way we viewed everything: money, life, you name it.  It allowed us to see and talk about things eye to eye.  Note: if you don't like this program, that's fine, I'm not trying to push anything on you, but please, PLEASE, have a solid financial plan and be in AGREEMENT on it BEFORE you get married.  You put yourself at risk to be broke, taken advantage of and commit or be the victim of financial infidelity.  You can't have a good marriage and hide things from one another; as my uncle says, "it will only end in tears, children." 

A few things (there are more, of course) that are important (to us, at least) in having a marriage filled with financial peace:  sharing a bank account, doing a budget together, write down your goals, and just keeping those lines of constant communication open.  Sharing a bank account - this allows you both to see where every dollar goes and helps prevent financial infidelity or even the temptation of it.  You and your spouse are more willing and able to hold each other accountable.  There is no worse feeling than seeing or hearing that your spouse is disappointed in you and doesn't trust you.  Ouch.  Don't give them a reason to be.  Share an account.  Doing a budget together - putting down on paper where every dollar for the month is going and giving it a name.  If it's not in the budget, you don't get to spend it.  That's that.  Both of you must agree before the month begins where to put the money and then DO IT.  We do our budget and then both sign it at the bottom of the page to commit to each other to follow it.  Write down your goals - how will you have a plan to get somewhere if you don't know where you're going in the first place?  Devise a plan and follow it.  Knowing what you both want, writing it down and saying it out loud to each other helps to make things more tangible and attainable, especially during times when you feel you're not making much progress.  Which brings me to my last point - communicate, communicate, communicate.  Hopefully, you already know this is important in any and every relationship, but especially in a marriage.  We keep each other motivated by talking about our dreams of what we want to do when we become debt free - pay for our kids' college educations in cash, own our paid-for dream home, travel the world together...it's fun to do these things and it keeps us motivated and connected at the same time. 

Be open and honest and willing to communicate with one another.  Listen to each other and have a plan.

Lastly, we live by these words:
"Commit to the LORD whatever you do, and He will establish your plans."
Proverbs 16:3

Faithfully,

The Culbreaths

VICTORY!

VICTORY is the word of the week!  Today we sold John's beloved Nissan 350Z.  I just want to note here how proud of him I am for giving up his car to help pay down our debt so that we, as a family, will have a better and more solid financial future.  We had the car (along with mine) listed on Craigslist and also parked in front of his brother's office (thanks, Jay and Steph), so it would be seen as much as possible.  We put it there not even one week ago and today received a phone call from someone who wanted to test drive it and ended up buying it!  We sold it under market value but still managed to make a couple hundred dollars along the way - so we didn't take a loss on it and tomorrow we will head to the bank and pay this baby off!  To add to the goodness, they are paying IN CASH, which makes our lives that much simpler.  Total amount of debt paid off in one month (including cc, student loans, cars, etc.) since starting our debt free marathon:  $9929.17!  A small chunk of our grand total but a huge victory, nonetheless.  We also had the joy today of finding out we will be getting a refund on our taxes this year instead of having to pay the IRS.  This is HUGE, as last year, we had to write them some big, fat checks!  I digress.  Tonight, we update our whiteboard by our bedside and get to pull out that permanent red marker (hooray!) to draw a line straight through that car loan.  And on to the next goal on the board, Nelnet (student loan) or my car, whichever comes first.  Look out, this debt snowball is gathering momentum!  Thank you for sharing our excitement in this victory and we hope we will celebrate another one shortly! 

"The plans of the diligent lead to profit as surely as haste leads to poverty."
Proverbs 21:5

Faithfully and VICTORIOUSLY,

The Culbreaths

Keep Attacking - by John

For us guys, it's hard to understand the feelings of insecurity about money.  But I have been thinking about debt a lot lately and I feel it's a great battle.  It's a battle where you just have to keep kicking, throwing punches, and staying on the offensive side of things, hoping that you just land one hit, one strike, etc.  This has finally happened for us!

The first hit was us getting tired of watching our hard earned money fly out the door.  You could call this "first punch" an attitude change.  Dave says there's a turning point where you're so mad and fed up that you just can't live the way your were living anymore.  This change has invigorated us - it has given us a feeling of power and confidence in our finances.  We know this fight will be a long one, but this new attitude has set a fire in us to see our debt come to an end. 

The second punch we landed was devising a plan.  Our plan is Financial Peace University (FPU).  Even though this is our third time through, this time it seems different.  We have laid out our list of debts, deciding to attack it one at a time.  We have a white board with this list by our bedside and we see it morning, noon, and night to keep our anger from smoldering.  Once we conquer the first debt on the list, we will purchase a permanent red marker to cross it out.  This board is forever changing our lives.  We will keep it FOREVER!  Our budget is tight and our debit cards have been screaming for use, but we use cash for everything these days. As the old saying goes, "One who doesn't plan plans for disaster."

The most recent strike has been figuring out what is a need and what is a want.  We have given up our wondrous cable, our intelligent IPhones, and, finally, our luxurious vehicles.  If we find something else that is not a need, we'll be getting rid of that, too! 

I know this will be a long and arduous journey but I can't give up hope or my faith - we just have to keep swinging, and little by little, we will be able to beat debt down.  I don't know when our next small victory will come - it could be a job, extra money coming in - but all I know is I have to keep swinging, keep attacking. 

Faithfully,

The Culbreaths

P.S. - Keep your swords sharp, my friends. 

Maxed Out

Tonight, John and I watched a documentary on Netflix entitled "Maxed Out."  I'm sure you can guess from the name of it that it was about credit cards - how Americans have gone overboard and kind of lost their minds charging everything to high heaven and borrowing WAY beyond their means!  I can honestly say it really broke my heart. 

There were so many people who owed so much because of poor decisions and no education on what they were getting themselves into.  There was one mother who was hundreds of thousands of dollars in debt (her family had no idea) and when the collectors started calling, she ran away and killed herself.  In another instance, two mothers were interviewed about their children; one had a son, one had a daughter.  Both of these "kids" went off to college and racked up thousands upon thousands of dollars in credit card debt - and both of them saw no way out other than to kill themselves.  How tragic is this?  Killing yourself over money? 

All the while, the movie flashed back and forth between the lives of American people and the United States government (don't get me started), who, as you can imagine, doesn't give a rat's behind about any of it (and even allows some major credit card lenders to right bills for them!).  These people need help!  I wish I could go out and educate them on the dangers of credit cards and borrowing money at such high interest rates that they'll be dead before they pay anything off.  They need hope and they need a plan. 

While I've never felt like killing myself over finances, I know what it's like to be neck deep and higher in debt - it sucks!  But I have hope.  God gave my husband and I hope through Dave Ramsey.  We don't use credit cards or really even our debit card.  We pay cash so we can see where our money is going.  And we REFUSE to take out loans!  There's no excuse for living beyond your means - NONE.  Period. 

I'm not even sure what I want to say the point of this post is....but I do want to say if you're in a place where you're drowning in debt, don't give up.  Have hope.  There is a way out.  It's not fast - in all likely hood, you didn't get into this situation quickly in the first place and you certainly aren't getting out of it that way, either.  So start over.  It's never too late.  I know it's hard and I know it's overwhelming, but with hard work, patience, faith, hope, and a plan, you'll get there!  We see the light at the end of the tunnel and it only makes us want it more! 

Hoping this offers a word of encouragement to you tonight, and remember...
"The rich rule over the poor and the borrower is SLAVE to the lender."
Proverbs 22:7
Wise words to live by.

Faithfully,

The Culbreaths